Hello and welcome back! If you’re new here, my name is Constance. I’m a relationship, dating and marriage writer for Luvjunktion.
I teach you how to stop wasting your time and energy on bad relationships and marriage by learning the skills that you need to have that happy lifelong relationship or marriage. So if that’s what you’re looking for, then I am happy you’re here.
Today we’re going to be talking about the best questions to ask women—questions that will help you connect with her better, or help to keep a conversation going with her, specifically like on a first date or scenarios like that.
And while I don’t want you guys to be rehearsing your conversations beforehand, it can help to know some questions to ask just so you feel a little bit more at ease going into the situation.
Your conversation should be genuine, and the questions that you ask her should come from a place of genuine curiosity, so please keep this in mind throughout this blogpost.
So ultimately, I think these six questions will help you connect with her and see if there’s compatibility there for a second date, while also learning more about her without the interaction feeling like a boring interview.
Take what you need and leave what you don’t, but I hope this blogpost gives you a little confidence boost for your next date or your interactions.
Ask Women These 6 Questions And She’ll Be Impressed
1. What does a typical day look like for you?
I think this is a really great alternative to just asking her what she does for work specifically, because it only gives her the ability to answer one little thing about her work.
And you don’t get to know what she does in the morning before work, or what she does after work, or how she spends her free time or down time.
So I think asking “what does a typical day look like for you” helps you get a little bit of insight into what she is like.
Framing the question this way helps broaden the way that she’s able to answer it, and ultimately just reveals a lot more about her.
She might talk about her routine, her career, what she does in her spare time—again, giving you another way to connect with her.
2. What are you most passionate about at the moment?
Again this is a great thing to ask instead of maybe “what are your hobbies?”
I think when a lot of people hear the word “hobby” and they freeze up a little bit because they aren’t sure what necessarily is considered a hobby—what you might consider a hobby, I might not, and vice versa.
So, what you’re “passionate about” can be far more than just a hobby and this is a really great way to frame the question.
If you want to know who a person is, a great way to do that is to find out what they love.
It could be her current job, it could be a hobby or interest, something she likes to do in her free time, a current goal of hers—there are so many different directions this question could go.
But regardless, it gives her a platform and a place to talk about something that she really loves and she’s interested in, which does a couple things for you, too.
One, it makes her feel special and comfortable. Everyone likes to talk about themselves and what they’re really interested in.
This is something that I would refer to as her “Golden Nugget,” which is basically something that makes a person light up when they talk about it.
It’s the thing that they could just talk about for hours or go on and on about, and it really allows them to kind of crack the shell and open up a little bit more because they’re talking about something that they’re familiar with and they really enjoy.
And number two, it helps you learn more about her. This is a very easy question to ask because you could ask her this after she mentions what she does for a living, or something she’s working on.
3. What is your favorite thing about where you grew up?
This could be a great follow-up question after asking her where she grew up, or a great way to kind of start that conversation in general.
Here you can learn a little bit more about her past and her childhood. If you happen to be from the same place, this is a really great way to connect and find similarities there.
But if she’s from somewhere else, this gives you a ton of questions to ask, and this conversation could lead into one about travel—maybe—which leads me into my next point here.
4. Have you traveled much, or do you want to?
This is great to ask instead of asking her what her recent travels have been, because maybe she hasn’t been anywhere lately and doesn’t really have an answer for you.
Talking about travel can be a really great way to connect if you guys have been to the same places, or—again, the second part of the question here—asking her where she would like to go, if she has any aspirations to visit certain countries or cities or whatever it is.
You could easily connect with her on that if that’s something that you guys have in common.
5. What is your favorite way to spend your weekends?
This can help you get a gauge on if your lifestyle is aligned, and again, as I mentioned earlier with the “what does a typical day look like for you,” this help kind of paint a picture on how she likes to spend her free time.
It can tell you a lot about her character or her values. Is she social, or is she more of a homebody?
If she goes out clubbing every single weekend with her girlfriends and you’re at home with your dog reading a book, the lifestyles might not align there.
Maybe she mentioned she likes to spend some time reading during the weekend—you could then talk about your favorite books.
If she tells you she likes to binge Netflix and relax, you could talk about a show you’ve seen lately or ask her what her favorite shows are, and that could be an entire conversation about movies and TV shows and things like that.
If she says she likes to go to a workout class, you could talk about some things about fitness in general.
The point I’m trying to make here is that this can lead you into many different topics and common interests if there are any, and also see if you’re at a similar place in life and looking for the same things.
Like I mentioned, if she’s going to the club every weekend drinking, partying with her girlfriends, and that’s not you at all, and you’re a homebody and you like to hang out with your dog or hang out with your family or read a book during the weekends, well, that’s a sign to you that maybe you are a little bit different.
So again, asking questions like this really helps you see if you guys are compatible and if your lifestyles will align.
6. What is something you want to learn or wish that you were better at?
And I really like this question because I think a lot of the time we get into the habit of asking people, “Oh, what are you good at? What are your skills?” and asking this on a first date can kind of make them feel like it’s an interview or like they need to brag about themselves or sell themselves to you, which can sometimes result in someone not being honest or just freezing up because maybe they’re humble and don’t want to brag.
Asking a question like this can allow a level of emotional maturity and self-awareness to be shown by discussing what we wish we were better at or what we could improve about ourselves.
And depending on her answer, this could also show a desire to learn and a learner mentality, which I think is a really great trait to find in a partner.
You might even realize that you both share common interests or want to learn the same thing, and that could be a really great, you know, segue into a different conversation or a second date.
Conclusion
So, to wrap this blogpost up, I think all of these questions do a great job at allowing you to learn a lot more about her, figure out if you guys are compatible or if your lifestyles will align, and they’ll also help you connect with her on a deeper level.
All of these are core topics that are very easy to dig deeper into once you get them started.
When we can connect with someone, it makes us feel closer to them and more comfortable, which is obviously ideal if you’re in a scenario like a first date.
So again, don’t fire these questions at her like she’s in an interrogation room or you’re in an interview, but just knowing these questions to ask and having these in your back pocket can be a really great way to feel more at ease and at peace in a situation if you’re someone who struggles with keeping a conversation going or flowing.