Hello and welcome back! If you’re new here, my name is Constance. I’m a relationship, dating and marriage writer for Luvjunktion.
I teach you how to stop wasting your time and energy on bad relationships and marriage by learning the skills that you need to have that happy lifelong relationship. So if that’s what you’re looking for, then I am happy you’re here.
In today’s post I’m gonna be talking about how to have a great first date, I’m going to be talking about five tips to have a great first date.
So regardless of what the outcome of the date might be, you’re not going to leave the date thinking, “I could have done this better” or “I should have done this instead.”
If you follow these five tips, you will have a great first date. Following these five tips are going to set you up for success and ensure that you have the best first date possible.
So with that being said, let’s go ahead and jump into it.
5 First Date Tips For Men That’ll Set You Up For Success
1. Dress Well
The number one on my list is to dress well, I’m not saying dress like someone you’re not or dress like what you think she would want you to look like.
Because let’s say you have a second date and you bought an outfit for the first date and you don’t have any more clothes like that, she’s going to catch on to the fact that maybe on the first date you dressed a little bit to impress her and that is not your actual style. So dress like yourself.
When I say dress well, I mean just dress like the best version of yourself and this is also going to depend on the type of scenario that you’re in for your date.
If you’re going for brunch on the weekend which is very casual, you’re going to want to dress in something like jeans, sneakers and a nice shirt, just looking a little bit more casual to fit the setting that you’re gonna be in.
The goal is to dress for the setting that you’re going to be in.
You don’t want to look like you tried too hard, so definitely don’t go to your date wearing a full-fledged suit unless for some reason you are famous, rich, fancy, going to a gala and taking her for the first date.
But just make sure you’re dressing for the setting and, like I said, dress like the best version of yourself.
You should look like you spent a little time getting ready; you don’t want to look like you rolled out of bed.
If I showed up to the first date and the guy shows up and his V-neck is looking like a U-neck and he looks like he was out partying all night and maybe has the worst hangover of his life, it’s going to be an initial turnoff.
And as much as I hate to say it, a lot of girls are that way. I’m not saying that looks are everything, but first impressions are very important, so you’re gonna want to make a good one.
2. Pick The Perfect Place
You’re gonna want to pick somewhere where you’re going to be able to get to know them to an extent.
As silly as that might sound, I don’t recommend bringing her to your place on the first date.
I think going somewhere public where you can be in a public setting and get to know each other one-on-one is very important.
So concerning what I said about bringing someone to your personal space on the first date, this is just so that you don’t show all your cards on the first date.
You want to leave a little room for imagination, a little room for mystery. You don’t want to show everything you have to offer on the first date;
That is something that may come after a few dates, after you get to know the person and have decided if you really like them or not.
Another thing I want to point out is that I don’t think a very fancy dinner date is a good first date because if you don’t even know if you like this girl or not. So, why do you have to spend tons of money on her?
Also, a fancy dinner date is not a great first date because you kind of lock yourself into this very nice, long, drawn-out formal meal.
Say you get like 20 minutes into this date and you know that you do not like this girl, you are stuck there in a four-course meal with a girl that you don’t like and you’re gonna have to pay for her.
And that’s why I would never recommend a super nice place for a first date, go somewhere casual, go somewhere fun.
You really want to get to know the person a little bit more here and not show your cards or show that you have tons of money, ‘cuz you’re going to attract the wrong type of girl that way.
3. The Conversations
I would argue that conversation is the most important part of a first date. On your first date, you should get to know about who this girl is and what she’s into.
You should definitely be curious and ask her questions, but she should be doing the same for you.
And if she is not giving you anything in return and it seems like she doesn’t want to get to know you at all, then maybe that should be a sign to you that maybe she just isn’t into you.
Which is totally fine; not every girl you go on a date with is going to be into you, and vice versa, and that’s totally okay.
Don’t ask her questions that you think she’s gonna want to answer or that are going to make her like you more.
You should be candid when asking her questions and you should not ask her pre-prepared questions or seem like a robot. You’re going to want to go with the flow.
Ask her about different things, notice the things that she’s into and the things that she lights up when she talks about, and stick to those things.
And maybe see if you can bounce off of those and flow with the conversation and see if the things that she lights up about are things that you guys both have in common.
And a very important point about the whole conversation element is, don’t sit there and talk about yourself the entire time.
I personally have been on first dates where all the guy does is talk about himself and doesn’t ask me anything; it’s really awkward and just very unenjoyable for the other party.
It’s just not really great and it’s kind of a turn-off. So don’t be that guy that sits there and talks about himself the entire date.
Show curiosity in her if you’re interested; if you’re not, well, then you know you don’t want to take her on a second date.
At the end of your conversation on your first date, you should really evaluate: do I want to get to know this girl more? Do I think we’re compatible at all? Is it even worth me going on a second date with her?
So these are all going to be things that you’re gonna want to think about after that first date, which is why it’s so important to have a nice conversation and to be in a place where you’re able to do that.
4. The Next Steps
That leads me to number 4 on my list, which is to be clear about the next steps.
If you don’t want to see her again, maybe she’s really into you and you are just not feeling her at all, don’t get her hopes up and her thinking that she’s gonna see you again.
If you’re someone that is just a one-night stand type of guy and you’re hanging out with just a one-night stand type of girl, this probably does not apply to you.
But if you’re someone that’s looking for something serious and you know that the girl is also serious—and you’ve made that clear from the beginning—then I think it’s very important to just be very clear and very honest about expectations and how you’re feeling.
When your date comes to an end, you don’t have to tell her right away, “Like, when can I see you again?”
You honestly don’t want to seem too eager or too available. Give it some thought; think about maybe where you’d want to take her next. You don’t need to jump on something so quickly.
Don’t tell her what you think she wants to hear. If you’re not sure if you want to see her again, don’t say anything yet. Just go home, think about it, sleep on it, and see where you end up.
Another important thing here is to not make yourself seem so available. I think a lot of times it’s a turn-off for girls if you’re super available and ready to see them 24/7.
While this might seem great in the beginning, there comes a point when this ends and you’re not always going to be available to spend 24/7 with them. So you don’t want to set unrealistic expectations in the very beginning.
But if you do want to see her again, tell her, plus it’s always a great way to end the date because it will make you feel better knowing that you’re both kind of on the same page or not.
5. The After-Date Text
So now I’m gonna talk about something that everyone dreads, which is the after-date text. As a girl, this is something that we all talk to our friends about.
“Should I text him and tell him that I had a good time?” “Should I wait for him to text me?” It’s like this big ordeal that doesn’t need to be a big ordeal at all.
But if you’re a guy and you had a great time with this girl, text her when you get home and tell her that you had a great time, it was great meeting her, or something along those lines.
Like I said, you don’t need to rush and make a next plan to see her again yet but just let her know that you had a good time so she isn’t sitting there freaking out with her friends wondering if she should wait for you to text her or what her next move should be.
Also, it’s just really attractive when a guy is confident and bold and lets you know that he had a good time and he liked spending the day with you.
If you’re able to text a girl after the date and tell her that you had a great time, it just comes across that you’re confident, and girls are going to like that.
I know this is contrary to popular belief; maybe some girls are into this whole game thing where you act uninterested in her.
But if you are trying to attract a nice girl that you’re gonna want to take home to your mom, that maybe you’re gonna want to have a relationship with, text her and tell her that you had a good time.
If she responds with similar energy to your text, you can tell that she feels the same way and she had a really great time too.
Now I think it’s okay to maybe ask her out again. So like I said, you don’t want to seem super available like you could hang out with her 24/7.
But maybe say something like, “Hey, had a great time with you today. I don’t know what the rest of your week looks like, but I would love to see you again,” or “I would love to take you out again,” something like that.
So you’re gonna want to take it slow, but definitely show your interest, and that’s how you’re going to land a second date with her and see where it goes.
Closing Note
Alright guys, that concludes my list of five tips to have a great first date. I hope that you all found this helpful. If you did, be sure to save the pin below and follow my Pinterest account for when I release new content.